Dating and the high demand for sociopaths

Sociopaths are described as people who behave in a manipulative way without regard for how their behavior affects people around them. I’ve decided I’d like to be a sociopath while on my little dating adventure. Or at least put on the same sociopathic mask that so many people in society seem to be wearing today. Why? Because sociopaths aren’t just rewarded in today’s dating world, they’re in ridiculous demand!

Here are a couple of sociopathic norms and practices that aren’t just encouraged, but expected (!!!) when you go out to date:

  • Only being positive – no matter what you’re facing in life, how terrible your family history and its trailing effects on you, and the actual state of your mind, you must never be negative! You’re not allowed to show your actual feelings because how dare you be a human being, instead of being the shining beacon of perfection who is everything your date wanted in a person and simply flawless?!
  • Saving all the negative thoughts and your true stances on sensitive or controversial topics for ‘later in the relationship’, or pretty much once the person has invested enough to be neck-deep in sunk cost.
  • Lying that you’re not seeing anyone else even though it’s common knowledge that in the early stages of dating, many people are usually seeing several others at the same time.
  • In order to not “hurt other people’s feelings”, pretend you’re having a good time during the date and then ghost them shortly after.
    • Beginner: Entertain them with a few replies after the date then stop replying.
    • Expert: Flat out leave any messages they send after the date unread.
  • When you meet someone whom you seem to get along really well, try to get a followup date scheduled. More importantly, you should also withhold how you actually feel so you don’t “send the wrong signal” while looking for an upgrade to a better date behind-the-scenes, like you’re trying to upgrade iPhones.
  • After you’ve met the person you’ve found to get along well with, instead of trying to meet more often and getting to know them to develop a relationship, go ahead and try to find the Next Best Date™ to match with so you can upgrade to the superior option and discard that previous person you got along with.
  • Once you’ve found two or more people whom you get along with, you’ll probably need some time to decide the best person, because this is like a job application where humans are just specification sheets and have no emotions. Proceed to lie even more by citing personal illness, family plans, etc. (don’t worry, it’s as easy as and just like how you fake calling in sick to work) to buy time for yourself.
  • So you don’t get any unwanted anger from doing the above, after you’ve selected the best person to carry on dating, just ghost everyone else who didn’t make the cut.
  • Or if you’re feeling nice, to avoid “leading anyone on”, send them a “thanks but no thanks” message that reads exactly like one of those rejection letters you get from applying for jobs. Sprinkle with plenty of well wishes that you don’t really mean (e.g., say “I wish you nothing but the best in everything that you do and I’m sure you’ll find your special someone someday too :)” even though you actually don’t give a crap whether that person remains single and alone for their lives or not).
  • Don’t delete the chat or the contacts with unsuccessful dating prospects even though you’ve decided to enter an exclusive relationship with the person you found, just in case you need a Plan B or Plan C.

I had some pretty negative hunches on the reality of dating, even years ago before I had a proper dating life, but people called me cynical and negative and to “just have fun dating”.

These days, with how successful I am in dating (after getting out of racist Europe and going from the 0th percentile of dating candidates there to what I estimate to be 70th-80th percentile in Asia) and online dating basically speeding and scaling up problems in dating, the above is what I’ve observed time and time again from first-hand experience.

I don’t think online dating is the cause of the dating imbalance and toxicity, but it sure exacerbates a lot of the problems. I think the saddest part is that online dating has become THE way to meet romantic partners and is here to stay as a staple of modern day dating.

I don’t agree with the approach at all – in fact, I think it’s quite disgusting, but not many people will talk about the realities of modern dating, let alone try to encourage change, and anyone who does (talk about it) is automatically labeled as a negative, cynical complainer.

They say if you can’t beat em, join em. So I’ll take one of those sociopath masks in XXL please.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *